Sexting is hot! From naughty words to saucy pics, smart phones can pack as much erotic power as our traditional battery-operated devices. And though this techno-sex behaviour is low risk in some respects (STIs, unintended pregnancy), it carries a unique set of risks with regard to personal disclosure.
Here are some tips for hotter, safer sexting:
Don’t show your face.
You’re gorgeous. But you don’t want that beautiful face attached to your super sexy body to be plastered on every social networking site around. Photos and videos can go viral and reach millions in a matter of minutes, so shoot from the neck-down.
Take close-ups.
This is a great way to keep your partner-in-sexting guessing as well as help disguise your identity. I have clients who go has far as adding fake tattoos to disguise their photos, as you can never be too cautious.
Ask first.
Sending unsolicited sexts is tantamount to harassment, so ask your flirty friend if they want your pics before you send them. Permission can be sexy, so use your imagination and be seductive and playful.
Leave something to the imagination.
If the first pic you send is a hot shot of your entire body or genitals, you leave no space for build-up and anticipation. Move gradually and make sexting about teasing, so that the grande finale is even hotter.
Clean up your room!
If you’re taking pics in your bedroom at least feign good hygiene by hiding the mess in the background. Nobody looks hot in front of a half-eaten pizza and dirty socks strewn about the room.
Don’t use emoticons.
Want to ruin a perfectly hot sext like “I want to taste you”? Add an animated winky face to expertly kill the mood.
See? You’re definitely not in the mood now thanks to that little yellow circle.
Emoticons are not sexy. Period.
Expect that the photos will be leaked.
Obviously you should only send pics to those you trust, but it’s better to err on the side of caution since sometimes our most trusted lovers can later turn into our arch nemeses. Maybe that’s a bit melodramatic, but you get the point: only send pics that wouldn’t ruin your career (or your life — more melodrama here!) if they were hacked or leaked onto the Internet.
Double-check before you send.
Most people in your contact list have no interest in seeing photos of you in various stages of undress. Ok. Maybe they are interested, but you’re likely not open to sharing these sexy photos with the whole lot of them, so be sure to double-check your sender field before you hit “Send”.
This double-check needs to be increased to a triple-check if you’re under the questionable influence of alcohol while sexting, as we all know that booze and phones can make for an explosive combination.
Dr. Jess (Jessica O’Reilly) is a sought-after sexologist with a PhD in human sexuality. She maintains a private practice in Toronto and travels the world to teach workshops that promote healthy and deliciously pleasurable sex. From hosting a reality show on PlayboyTV to coordinating retreats in the sunny Caribbean, she relishes in every moment!
